March 24, 2025
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An Update from John...

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It is with deep sorrow that on this day, March 23, 2025 at
7:50pm, our mother Verla Rae has passed just 3 months
short of her 99th birthday. About the time of her passing
the wind picked up and started to howl. Jessica was in
Lake Mills and the power flickered at exactly that time,
giving her that uneasy feeling that something had
happened. It was very hard watching her the last few days
knowing it was inevitable.

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Watching her bought back so many vivid memories of the illness I went through. I found myself understanding the Delirium I had gone through watching and listening as she fought through those same confusing demons I had experienced. Even though she didn't know it, once again, in the closing hours of her life she was teaching me and helping me further understand what I had gone through and how precious it is to listen and understand the situations that surround us. She was a fighter that never gave up, and passing on that spirited trait may very well have kept me alive.

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My mother worked in the bakery since the 1960's. She worked as a clerk and loved every customer she helped. So many of you yet today ask when you see me " How's your mom?" She was so well loved and loved all in return, that's just who she was.

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I find myself to be so privileged to not only be her son, but to have lived and worked side-by-side with her and my father for nearly 6 decades. As I sat the past two days with her, many memories flashed through my mind. Growing up in northern Wisconsin's town of Barron, she was one of three children to Zude and Ruby Jones. My Aunt Gwen lived in Marion ,Ohio and passed in her late 90's, and the youngest, Aunt Donna, died from lung cancer in her late 70's. I never had a chance to know my Grandfather, but I was told of many stories of how he loved to fish. Fly fishing to be exact. Her mother "Ruby" was just like my mother, a very warm and loving woman. Her maiden name was Timblin and had seven sisters and one brother. My Great grandmother lived into her upper nineties, her siblings were all in their upper 80's or 90"s, but Grandma Ruby was 100. My dad always teased her that he was going to out live her, and he nearly did, making it to the age of 93.

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I must give tons of credit to my sister Carol, who moved back from her home in Houston nearly 6 years ago to help take care of my mother. My mom also had a caretaker, Sara, who helped her and my dad for several years.

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Of the three children my mother had, I apparently was the "mischievous " one. By the time I was two, I knew if i heard "JOHN HENRY!" I needed to hightail it to the nearest hiding place.

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My mother worked hard for us all. She majored in art and music at River Falls. She never finished her degree but loved her violin, giving lessons when I was younger. Her artistic abilities help shape my sister in pursuing her degree as an art teacher, and to further her work to her masters in art history. Her firm religious beliefs kept us all in church and Sunday School programs (believe me, I needed it!). It also helped my brother enter the ministry graduating with a degree in , then from the Luthern School of Theology, and his Doctorate in Theology from the University of Indiana, which included studying at the Vatican in Rome, and Oxford University. David would go on to build and minister to Assention Luthern Church in Minocqua, nearly ministering to a congregation of nearly 1000+ members from 1984 to 2018.

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Then there's me. My senior year of high school found me being accepted to The University of Minnesota Duluth. My intentions were to study Biology with an emphasis on The Great Lakes ecology, their fisheries and their watersheds. I can still hear my mother saying" it's so far from home, stay here and get your basics then transfer if you still want to". It was later revealed that the "far" was actually too far away to keep me under her thumb. Well, we all know where that went.... one year of basics at Milton College.... ( yes, it's gone now, I think the archeology dig starts next week) and then onto Bon Ton Tech to learn the fine crafts of bread, buns and donuts.

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But, hey..... look how that turned out. She knew me better than I knew myself!

We all.love our mother's dearly, but like many of us, we always didn't let them know.

For me it was a difficult word to say. Not that I didn't love her. I just feel I fell into that category of men that can't always share that emotion. Saying the word "love" comes over as a weakness, that you're soft, kind of mushy. When in fact it's the strongest emotion and show of strength there is. I've learned the hard way that sharing that one word can change sorrow into happiness. I fell back though today. I sat and watched Carol, Jessica, Cindy, and others tell my mother repeatedly that the loved her. As I sat, I prayed for her pain to ease, and thought about the happy memories we had through our lifetime. I know she knew i was there and understood me and knew what was in my heart. I wasn't there when my dad passed. I was on the road headed back from Janesville. I did have the privilege of staying with him at Aldens that afternoon alone. As I waited for his pickup, I prayed, and remembered the memories and evan had a good laugh about things we did together. In all, I miss them both dearly.

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My love for both is unwavering. As of today, you're together again.

Mom, you've worked so hard through the years for all of us.

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Today, you rest....

Love you....

 

Love you guys

Never give up!

John